The ugly truth

Hi and hello. This is my first post. I don't really blog since my highschool years but today is an exception. Guess I've been holding back for so long and I just need to let it out. Kau faham tak rasa yg kau sorg je tahu and you just need to keep it to urself? well tu yg aku rasa skrg. I've never been this way since my last breakup w my gf when I was 18 back then. She wrecked me badly and it took me 2 years to finally move on. And now shit just happened again.

Idk, when someone u truly love cheated on u once, most people will leave them. But, aku? I used to be the "most people" but I've never been in a situation where someone that means the world to me asked for a second chance. So, I did gave her a second chance even she fucked up big time. Yknow why? because I loved her -  way too hard and I just can't let her go. 

Truth is, I'm not ready to lose someone that I loved so much. So long story short, I'd give a go for sec chance. To me aku rasa everybody make mistakes and apa salahnya if aku bagi peluang? bcs I used to cheat once and I deserved my karma. But thing is, this karma keeps on haunting me. I thought my previous r/shp was my karma and it took me 2 fucking years to moved on, but man this karma shit thing keeps on going. 

I've been cheated on twice by my ex and present gf. I guess, I am born to be lied and cheated on.. :(